Post-Modern Post

Here is the poem I created based on my second ten page story:

Moms don't know half of what goes on

...And grandpa...
He pulls a lung, black and scarred
from the back of his throat.

Uncle Frank sews pieces onto the AIDS Quilt,
And I...

Forgive me.
Children are scared of the dark
and the whirr of a white machine
spinning around their heads.

You're on Candid Camera.
Growing and pushing
and bleeding inside itself,
it could have been tragic.

Blue cotton gowns don't cover up fear.

Pink Institution

The Pink Institution was probably the best or second best book I have read this semester. I enjoyed the non-traditional format of the novel, as well as just the story itself. What really interested me, however, was the complete objectivity of the narrator as she told the story of her family. I didn't realize until about halfway through the novel that the narrator was actually related to all of the people she was talking about, and when I finally found out, I was completely surprised and thrown off (in a good way).
There was so much trauma in the lives of all of the characters, but rather than tell the readers that the events were traumatic, painful, depressing, whatever, Saterstrom took a completely post-modern approach and allowed the reader to draw their own conclusions about the events. I really admired this about Saterstrom. My first ten-pager was somewhat loosely based off of my parents' relationship before my birth, and if I had the time, I may have reworked my story to have their child (Fiona) be the narrator. I think what happened between the couple (the mother bringing an STD home--which didn't happen in real life) would have been quite traumatizing for a young child, so it would have been interesting to see how I could report that story objectively.
The narrator in "P.I." even describes her eating disorder objectively, which is the most interesting thing to me. The disorder is clear evidence that everything that happened with her family was damaging to her, but she never once relates the two in the story. That job is left completely to the reader.
I am normally somewhat of a romantic, and I do enjoy romantic literature, so this kind of reading is a big departure for me. I do have to say though, that I will definitely seek out more work that is similar to this in the furture.

Expansion and revision

Better late than never!

When revising my longer works, I try to move entire paragraphs, sections of dialogue and plot points around in the story to see if approaching things in a completely different way can make the story any better. Sometimes I end up leaving everything how it was to begin with, but quite often I end up making major changes to the story. This helps keep the writing process interesting for me, because it is almost as if I am working on a completely different piece. It also helps to make the story flow better and make more sense (most of the time).

As far as expansion goes, I usually tend to expand on characters' back stories more than anything else. I find that once you have the major plot points that you want to hit written, it can help tie everything together to get some insight into why the characters are where they are. In my most recent story, my main female character is suffering from an unknown chronic illness, and her boyfriend has to take care of her. After a particularly graphic vomitting scene, I added in a section about how the girl was when the boy met her to make his attraction to her more believeable. Before I added this section their relationship didn't make much sense.

Another Revision Post

For me, revision is incredibly important. I am the kind of person that writes without stopping or correcting for my first draft, so I could never get away without revising. I like to get all my thoughts recorded before they disappear, so usually, my first draft is a huge mess that doesn't even resemble a story. From there, I pick out the pearls, line them up, and fill in all the space in between.
When I revise, I usually make major changes. I know most people just fix the grammatical errors and restructure awkward sentences, but I believe that revision should be greater. So no matter how good I think my story or essay is, I always try to play around with the plot and rework the major ideas. Sometimes I end up going back to how I had things originally, but that reworking at least gives me a chance to see other ways of telling the story. I even get ideas for new stories while I am revising once in a while. Overall, I think revision is a completely necessary step in crafting a functional story.

Poems

Here are two new poems, written for another class. I figured it couldn't hurt to send them off into the world. Maybe somebody will be kind enough to offer some feedback so I can improve them.

Edinburgh

Malt-scented Edinburgh is perched within me,
forever calling for me to return. "Why did you leave me?"
She cries from the moors.
"You belong here," she sings from the top of Arthur's Seat.
The clock made from purple heather and yellow and white roses
counts the minutes in the Edinburgh gardens until I am back again.
Greyfriars Bobby has abandoned his master,
and now waits for me to come home.







Migraine

Everything is lit up
bright white
radiating
into everything else.
I can't tell
where one thing ends
and another begins,
no matter how hard
I strain.
Two rooms over,
my cat jumps off the couch.
Twin Towers
crashing to the ground.
I scream
in agony.
The pain is too much.
Another paroxysm of nausea
sends saltine crackers,
Excedrine,
and sour, frothy, green bile
rocketing
across white bed sheets.



Hope you guys enjoy, or are at least mildly entertained for a few minutes.

<3 always,
Heather

Spring

Spring is here, and it is snowing. How poetic.

Revision

I believe more in the scissors than I do in the pencil.


--Truman Capote


I think I agree with this quote. I find that when I write, the first few paragraphs, or lines or even pages tend to be me getting warmed up. If you revise properly, you should be able to cut away a lot of the fluff and "warmup writing" and get down the the real meat of what you're trying to get at. I think a lot of writers can benefit from cutting away everything that is not vital to the story or message of their writing.

Revision should really be a "re-seeing," not just changing a few words or a few commas. I always try to second guess and question everything in my writing when I really revise, though sometimes I leave it to the eleventh hour and I only have time to change a few major issues.

I always take into account comments from my peers and professors, and they can be very helpful, but I think it is incredibly important to take your writing in the direction YOU want it to go. I wouldn't change a piece of writing just to get an "A" on it. Fortunately, most professors grade revisions based on how much effort you put in, and not how much they actually like the piece.

I think I like revising better than actually writing something for the first time. I like making discoveries about my own work, and realizing things about characters and plot lines that I never meant to happen when I sat down to write the original.

So, there you have it, my thoughts on revision. I can't wait to read what others of you have written!

<3 always,
Heather